The Ophelia Syndrome

In class a few days ago, we talked about the Ophelia Syndrome. This is the idea that people are either like Ophelia or Polonius. Ophelia was a woman who could not make her own decisions. She backed out and let other people think about and decide things for her. Polonius was a man who wanted to make all the decisions. He believed that he had wisdom and could make the best decisions for other people. These characteristics are extreme and usually the people we associate with are a mixture of the two. We also talked about whether we think we are more like Ophelia or Polonius. This kind of self exploration is very helpful when it comes to a field study in a foreign country.

Someone who is like Ophelia will have a hard time making decisions and planning things. This is not conducive to a good field study because of how many decisions we have to make on our own. Almost everything is completely independent. I was initially surprised when I found out how much I would have to do for my own project, but I think that in the long run, I will be grateful for the opportunity to stretch my abilities. I have already had to make a great deal of decisions, like what my project will be, buying plane tickets, and studying the language.

Conversely, one cannot be like Polonius. We cannot take charge of those around us, assuming that we have more wisdom or intelligence than anyone else. As I move throughout the world, I have found that the best way to become friends with someone is to assume that they are smart, witty, and have society's interest at heart. Most people are capable of making reasonably well-informed decisions. In our field study class, we are gently guided by those in charge. They never make decisions for us, which forces us to come up with questions and answers on our own. It seems unnatural because throughout my life people have told me what to do, when to do it, and how to do it. Sometimes I feel like I'm groping around in the dark because of how much I still don't know about Tonga and plants and traveling. But what better way to learn than by first hand experience?

I believe it may also be advantageous to figure out what kinds of people the members of my group are. When you know what kind of people you're living and working with it, it becomes easier to understand why they live the way they do and consequently how they might respond to certain situations. For example, because I know that my sister values spending time with those she loves, I make sure I have time to devote to her. If I don't, she feels neglected and left out of my life. Things like this can help all kinds of relationships flourish, even and especially in strained conditions.